Photo: Alex T.
Photo: Unknown photographer via Squidoo
Photo: Via Backyard Nature 
Photo: Becka Spence
Photo: Jay Free
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Photo: Frobo512
Photo: Unknown photographer via Holybug 
Photo: Frobo512 
Photo: Unknown photographer via Squidoo 
Photo: Via Backyard Nature Today, we’d like to take a look at a plant that is especially close to our, er, hearts – the cactus! The following pictures will prove that this prickly green friend can be quite a source of amusement.
First, let us introduce the species with a little help from Wikipedia: “Cacti are distinctive and unusual plants (you bet), which are adapted to extremely arid and hot environments (absolutely), showing a wide range of anatomical and physiological features (ah-huh, we’re listening) which conserve water. Their stems have adapted to become photosynthetic and succulent, while the leaves have become the spines for which cacti are well known. Cacti come in a wide range of shapes and sizes” – though we all know that size doesn’t matter.
Cactus in front of a hotel in Cinque Terre, Italy
This red cactus is apparently common in Yucatan and even said to have, er, enhancing properties if boiled and eaten as a soup. Right…
The next specimen belongs to the Cephalocereus gaumeri species and is often referred to as "old man" cactus, because of the white wool on top looking like long white hairs – not what you’re thinking. The limp things hanging down from the cactus fruits are flower remains. Maybe it’s not a cactus man after all?
Cephalocereus gaumeri
What this cactus seems to have too much of…
... this one seems to lack. Little blue pills, anyone?
It’ll take some balls to come out of hiding.
Tom, Dick and Harry playing the same old tune…
Pretties in pink.
Subtlety is not his strength.
Going somewhere?
At the risk of this post missing good taste by a few inches, here’s a real “cactus” problem regarding someone’s “red ball cactus” that will leave you speechless: “I believe that is the name, it was a green stock with a red prickly ball on the top. I received it in first grade and a few years later, the ball dried up. I still have it and the ball is still attached but it is dried up and yellow/brown.... Could you let me know if there is anything I could do to make my cactus less overwhelming?”
Told you! There’s nothing we could possibly add after this excursion into nature’s sense of humour.
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17 comments
Poozo (not verified) says:
May 24th, 2009 at 1am
Wow, you completely missed the best cactus dick around...
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2410/2082398871_bb44f04c06.jpg
A Google image search for "cactus penis" finds this and many other cacti that should have been on the list.
david (not verified) says:
May 24th, 2009 at 2am
Any idea on the species for pic #4? Never seen structures on a cactus like that before, but it looks similar to a mycelium/hyphae network.
Sadly the photographers flickr page doesn't know either.
GoodNoise (not verified) says:
May 24th, 2009 at 3am
Or how about these two versions of the same cactus:
http://www.somegoodnoise.ca/2008/12/06/mums-cactus/
http://www.somegoodnoise.ca/2008/12/28/serenade/
kenny winkleman (not verified) says:
May 24th, 2009 at 9am
that pasty pale ghost faced fake cowboy wish he had a big penis like the colored man, i pity the small white penis god give the white man
Television SPY (not verified) says:
May 24th, 2009 at 2pm
That guy in the 2nd last picture will never live this down.
He thought it would be just a funny pic that his co-workers would never see - he thought wrong.
dhruvank (not verified) says:
May 25th, 2009 at 10am
hey simone...this really a cool piece of investigative journalism :)
karubi (not verified) says:
May 25th, 2009 at 12pm
10 Most big dicks On Earth is better for title
shi (not verified) says:
May 25th, 2009 at 1pm
Thanks for follow on Twitter. Nice blog. Let us meet on blogs...
Belunan (not verified) says:
May 26th, 2009 at 7am
I was expecting something slightly creative. Instead, it's just plants starting out from the ground and growing upward as efficiently as possible, which is often a straight line. This article should have been called 'Pictures of Cacti From Artists With Cock On Their Minds That Were Smart Enough To Convince Some Robotic Moron That This Shit Was Worth An Article.'
Oh, I guess thats a bit long.
visalittleboy (not verified) says:
May 26th, 2009 at 6pm
I wanna take a pic on them once...hehhe..
That's really funny!
Thanks for sharing!
erdos0 (not verified) says:
This one should be included: http://denshao2.com/photogallery/albums/userpics/dcam1908.jpg